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Say It Ain't So, Helio.

A couple of weeks ago, I attended Monterey Auto Week and watched nine former Indianapolis 500 winners race around Mazda Raceway Laguna Seca for eight laps in an event called The Legends of Indy.

It was supposed to ceremonial in nature with drivers like Bobby Rahal, Al Unser, Sr. and Emerson Fittipaldi cruising around in specially equipped Scion TCs.

But it turned out to be rather competitive. Derek Bell won with ease, but there was a lot of strategy, bumping on a few turns and a spin out or two.

These guys I admire.

But now comes along Helio Castroneves, the Indy 500 winner in 2001 and 2002, saying he'll compete while paired with professional dancer Julianne Hough in Dancing With The Stars. The glitzy and rather cheesy television reality show is a huge hit for ABC.

Other celebrities dancers will include: Mark Cuban, billionaire owner of the Dallas Mavericks; world boxing champion Floyd Mayweather Jr.; iconic Las Vegas singer Wayne Newton; Melanie Brown, aka "Scary Spice" and "Mel B"; Sabrina Bryan of Disney Channel's "Cheetah Girls"; Actress Jennie Garth (Beverly Hills, 90210); Model-actress Josie Maran; Soap opera star Cameron Mathison ("All My Children"); Singer Marie Osmond; model Albert Reed; and actress Jane Seymour (" Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman").

Hough is reigning co-titlist with Olympic speed skater Apolo Anton Ohno. And listening to Castroneves, the duo might have a pretty good chance to win this time around.

"I'm really excited for this opportunity," said Castroneves. "It's definitely something that I never would have imagined participating in. However, now that I know that I'm going to be part of the competition, I've set my sights on winning.

"I know it's going to be a lot of hard work, but with our IndyCar Series season coming to a close, I'm going to dedicate the same energy that I bring to racing to rehearsing for the show."

I don't get it.

I watched those former Indy 500 winners and they all still looked cool, yet fiercely competitive. And I can't imagine Castrovenes needs this gig for any reason — publicity, sponsorships, image tweaking — anything.

Maybe they just don't make Indy drivers like they used to. Then again, maybe I just don't get it. And come to think of it, I'm not really interested in getting it, either.

Anyone care to enlighten me?